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Sick leave :(

I don’t own this image. It’s just perfect for this post. Google search.

Aaaand I got an extra Christmas present going back to Italy: a bronchitis! It’s a nasty, bad one that makes you feel like your respiratory trait were hijacked by a herd of cows and got so in love with you, that doesn’t want to go away. 

I’ve been out sick for over two weeks now and I hope I’ll be better soon, since I cannot stand anymore this condition.

I’ve been coughing my lungs out for the past weeks and I have pain everywhere as consequence of the effort. 

I might had luck with yesterday’s GP appointment as I requested the doctor I trusted more in the whole surgery. She gave me a very aggressive medication which should help. 

My brother, who’s also a doctor but, alas, lives in Italy, said it should be the right cure. Fingers crossed, folks! 

And this is the post I’m writing now at 5 a.m. since I couldn’t sleep anymore for the cough. Damn it! 

This condition is the reason why, once again, I’m in late in starting updating my blog. Nice, it seems I always have an excuse! 

But is it an excuse or I’m right down unlucky? 

I admit to be not consistent at all. Actually no, I’m consistent in something: making lists. You know that by now. I love making lists, I believe mainly because it makes me feel a bit more in control over things. 

However, I have a great ability of not following them. I feel happy when I start ticking voices out of them but then I stop mid-list, but I don’t know why. 

It’s not even because I don’t want to try harder or because I’ve lost concentration or will to finish. It’s a bit confusing, but I think this is due to the fact that I cannot finish what I’ve set my mind to do…I swear this made perfect sense at 5 a.m. after two hours sleep! 

The most consistent thing I’ve done so far was sticking to the writing, although in a very poor way and to this blog, in an even poorer manner. 

New years new me, as they say, might not work well for me. Actually I’m really sure is just a big fat bull, nothing changes really. Whoever wants to change a detail in his or her life can do it any time of the year. 

And do you know what? I’m trying, no… to be precise I’m trying very hard. 

Maybe not hard enough, maybe I’m not focusing properly, who knows. I’m trying to figure it out. 

So, do your realize what you’ve just read? The very first rant of the year! 

I want, just for this time, to give my-self a big excuse! I’m tired, I’m sick and I haven’t been sleeping for the past three weeks. 

To all this you can add the worry of the still uncertain position in my work place since I haven’t passed the probation period time yet. 

But maybe, the thing that hit me like a block of marble falling from the quarries is understanding that among my colleague there is only one who cares a bit about me. 

I mean not everybody should be friend with everybody, I’m big enough to know that, but still in a very nice and kind place like the one I think I’m working in, it’s a bit disappointing that no other people cared if I was dead or alive.

No messages, no mails, nothing. As lately I felt a bit nostalgic and I missed so much home and friends in Italy, this realization was a bit of punch under the belt. 

I think that this is the beginning for the next rant though. 

I fear that, if I really have to believe in forecasting the 2016 conditions judging on what I’ve just seen, this year will be very unlucky and full of rants. 

I hope, my faithful readers, that you’ll bear with me all the same. 

So how was your beginning of the year? 

Tell me what did you do in the comments below. 

And, most of all, if you have any generous advice, please I beg you write it down!

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